Awful (that's it)

i got to see lycan today, but once again my little brother got in the way of a perfect evening. he doesnt know when to leave us alone and no matter how much my dad tells him to leave us alone he doesnt listen. tonight his excuse was "well you didnt tell me that TODAY." its obvious that that applies to everytime i see him! he so stupid! and lycan is too nice of a guy to tell him to leave us alone. it's awful. my little brother acts like lycan is just another one of his stupid little friends.

i think i've finished with my rant, but i am just so freaking pissed right now it is unreal. i cried more when he left. i miss him so much and whenever i see him it's never enough. hell! i start to miss him even before he leaves. i think that means that i love him and i know i do, i have for a while. but i think this is kinda like physical proof almost cause i never cried like this with the last guy i was with. i cried over him once, but with lycan i've cried so many times i cant even count. and everytime it's been because i missed him so much. i wish i didnt cry everytime he left, but at the same time it feels good cause before all of this i hardly ever cried so it's nice to have some sort of release.

and now onto new stuff and not me crying over lycan



i am now officially hooked on this german band called tokio hotel.



this is them:

i originally heard of them from my friend libby, but then i kept seeing the leader singer (bill kaulitz) name pop up in MI (mortal instruments) forums on who would make a good magnus (which he so would. he has the awesome hair for it) . so i went and i typed his name into the google bar and i found TH's webpage and i started to listen to the music on it and now i've been listening to the same 4 songs all day. it is really good music, but when i first heard his voice he sounded kinda girly, but not anymore. i think that was cause i wasnt used to it. my favorite song is between "dont jump" and "monsoon". they're both really awesome.


here's the video of "dont jump"

and here is "monsoon"

and i jsut found out that i am now more miserable than i was when he left cause i just found out that his computer has some sort of virus so he cant im me. so now i'm bawling like a baby again and i am absolutely miserable. i swear the universe is against me, that's the only solution. i guess that's all for tonight. i think this is the longest post i've ever done.

Sapphire